What is one to do when one finds themselves thinking about Someone way too much in very interested manner? One could stalk Someone, keep everything in and get angsty inside, or one could simply ask Someone on a date. I recently struggled with this issue myself and chose the latter method. To each his/her own, though. For the method I chose, I desperately needed to find a way to MAKE SURE Someone said “yes.” Here are a few ideas I came up with:
1. THE OZ METHOD-
OZ: I’m gonna ask you to go out with me tomorrow night. And I’m kinda nervous about it, actually. It’s interesting.
WILLOW: Oh. Well, if it helps at all, I’m gonna say yes.
OZ: Yeah, it helps. It-it creates a comfort zone. Do you wanna go out with me tomorrow night?
WILLOW: Oh! I can’t!
OZ: Well, see, I like that you’re unpredictable.
WILLOW: Oh, it’s just it’s Buffy’s birthday, and we’re throwing her a surprise party.
OZ: It’s okay.
WILLOW: But you could come. If you want to.
OZ: Well, I don’t wanna crash.
WILLOW: No, it’s fine! Well, you could be m… my date.
OZ: All right. I’m in.
See? She said “yes” first!!! (This is from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Will talk more about Buffy later!)
2. SOMEHOW SNEAK IT INTO THE CONVERSATION: hint* quickness is key!! They will never know what hit them!
“What are you doing..Oh that’s really cool. I’ve heard people do that. So are you going anywhere this weekend?..Cool shoes, where’d you get them?..Do you like mangoes?.. No, I really don’t care for them that much either. They’re such a pretentious fruit…Is that your homework you’re doing? Calculous suck…But you’re good at calc, aren’t you? Yeah, do you want to go out on a date with me Saturday? Oh and did you leave yor art project in last block because I think I saw it and I could get it for you if you want… Yes and yes? Perfect.. Pick you up at 8.”
3. PICTIONARY METHOD:
fill in the blank: MNOPQRST___VWXYZ (U)
How many in a pair? ___ (2)
Not height, but _______. (width)
[INSERT PICTURE OF YOURSELF]
Put it all together and what do you get: Do u wand 2 go out width me???? YES because you are so clever and funny!!!
4. THAT AWKWARD MOMENT METHED: Draw a cartoon of you asking them out on a date and them saying “yes” with a ‘CONTACT THE ARTIST’ at the bottom! Zac Efron did this in That Awkward Moment, and if ZAC EFRON did it, it must be awesome and cute!! If Someone is not aware of this movie, let them know and I’m sure they will change their answer if they need to.
5. BIRTHDAY SURPRISE ATTACK EDITION:
Pedro-style: leave a Birthday cake on the door step with something GREAT written on it like “Will you go out with me?” Make sure you run away before they see you and don’t leave a name or phone number because otherwise they will know who you are and automatically say “No.” Secret admirers are the best ones and are not at all creepy and stalker-y. No matter what anyone tells you.
6. CHECK YES OR NO:
This method is a classic, so it leaves room for creativity. You can decorate the note, make it scented, make it like a brochure for why they should check “yes” or “no,” or put it on cool stationary. You can ad boxes, too like one for “maybe, can I think about it,” “it’s not you, it’s me,” “I’m dating someone (because I’m a slut- but wait, slut-shaming is not a thing),” “yes, and would you marry me (if this box is checked, nevermind, date’s off),” or even “my sexuality makes me unattracted to you,” etc. Or you could just keep it simple, but remember, the tackier, the better with this method.
7. THE RYAN GOSLING METHOD
Blackmail is always fun!! So, you can do like Ryan in The Notebook and hang from a high place threatening to let go if they don’t date you.
Ok, really, don’t do this. I fear for your safety. And every time I see this scene I get really upset thinking about such a beautiful man falling from such a high place and I can’t even function. I have to go google his other movies to reaffirm that he is an actor and that was just a very well-played role of his!
These were all created as a way to distrace from the actual looming task of a) asking a person out and getting an answer and b) figuring out what to do, what to wear, or how to act normal on the date. Don’t think about that now, though. FACE NOTHING! Hide behind your humor and creativity. I, myself, went for the Oz Method which was stupid because the person doesn’t watch Buffy. Also, he replied “Well, I have to go to a funeral on Saturday.” BEST EXCUSE EVER. But he said YES!!! (We went out Sunday and I made Mexican and we chatted and it was great!) So, the Oz Method is proven to work anyways!!
NOW GO ASK SOMEONE ON A DATE. If you want.